This has been one hell of a horrible summer. Brian lost a grandfather, I lost a grandmother and we've gotten numerous bad health news from both sides of the family. Not to mention the economy, resulting in Brian's work cutting his hours and my work having layoffs and me now doing two people's job.
But there's a light at the end of the tunnel.
If anything, I think I've learned something about myself. I do too much for other people. I love my friends and my family, but I always tend to drop everything for them. I am so addicted to overbooking my life that I don't ever leave time for myself. Brian's been trying to tell me that for years. It wasn't until now that I realized how true that really is.
Back in college, I had a minor breakdown. I started seeing a counselor and she asked me, "what do you do for you?" And I couldn't answer the question. I recently asked myself that question again. "What do I do for myself?" Honestly, I don't know. So, I asked myself a different question.
"What do I want to do for myself?"
- make jewelry and build my business
- lose weight and be healthy
- play outside more: hiking, kayaking, camping, running a 5k
- home improvement projects
- go to more local activities: museums, plays, community events
- take a much needed vacation
Bad habits are extremely hard to break. I NEED to break the habit of constantly going, going, going. I'm living for the future, but not enjoying the present. I'm a planner by nature. It's something I've always done. But I'm exhausted. REALLY exhausted. I'm ready to slow down. I'm ready to say that I have done all those things for ME.
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